Last week’s sermon walked us through Genesis 31, where we saw Jacob hit the road after twenty years in the east. His father-in-law Laban had manipulated and controlled and cheated him for way too long, and it was time for him to return to the land of promise as God directed him.
But just as Jacob feared, Laban tried to stop him. Laban apparently thought he has ownership over Jacob. “Then Laban answered and said to Jacob, ‘The daughters are my daughters, the children are my children, the flocks are my flocks, and all that you see is mine'” (Genesis 31:43). Laban is talking nonsense here. He sounds like a mob boss—or maybe just one of the many dysfunctional grandparents throughout history who missed the memo in Genesis 2:24 about their adult children leaving home to start new families of their own.
A few weeks ago, a friend of mine told me about his grandparents who have really struggled with their grandchildren living more than a few minutes from home, and have put intense pressure on their family to stay put within the same few square miles.
Perhaps we can understand that coming from unbelievers, whose only hope is in this life, and for whom family really is everything because they have nothing else. But when grandparents know the Lord, they can avoid the example of Laban. They can give up control, and with tears bless their children and grandchildren to go wherever the Lord directs them to do whatever He wants them to do.
I’m so grateful my in-laws gave us that gift when we moved to Nipawin. Our family was small, our youngest was still a baby, and though there was sadness, they did not for one minute try to make us feel bad for moving away in pursuit of kingdom fruitfulness.
When Paul invited Timothy to accompany him (Acts 16:1-3), Timothy left behind Eunice, his faithful mother, and Lois, a godly grandmother, both of whom had invested years of love and training into him (2 Tim 1:5, 3:15). Just think of what we all would have missed out on if they had selfishly guilted Timothy into staying close to home.
Arrows in a quiver aren’t meant to stay there—they’re for shooting at the enemy (Psalm 127:4-5). I can’t imagine Lois and Eunice had dry eyes as they said their goodbyes to Timothy, but would they also not have felt joy at seeing what all their years with him had built up to? They had trained him in the Scriptures so that they could unleash him on the kingdom of darkness, and every reader of the New Testament is, in one sense, in their debt.
So as we search the Scriptures for examples of wise grandparenting, let’s look to Lois, not Laban. If you have grandchildren, invest in them so that they—and through them, God-willing, many others—may spend eternity with the Lord, not just holidays and Sunday dinners with you. There will be a cost involved, but the rewards will be infinitely worth it.
